Week 1: Timing is Everything

Our Early Days

For Tyler and I— it was not love at first sight. We went to the same conventional high school and had one class together where we sat across from one another. We were both a bit on the delinquent side; I used to sell him rolled cigarettes for .25¢ a pop. He was outgoing, a bit of a class clown, shaved head, tattoos, and beautiful baby blues. How could I not have a crush on him? But, as life so often teaches us, timing is everything. We both left the traditional high school system our sophomore year. We ended up going to the same charter school for our last 2 high school years but since the program only required us to go to school two or three times per week, we never ran into each other. I did, however, run into my now best friend who I had previously gone to school with; we just happened to live about a mile away from each other. I was a bridesmaid in her wedding last August. It would still be another 4 years before Tyler and I actually became Tyler and I.

 

Then on October 8th 2014 I got a random Facebook message from a guy I went to high school with and hadn’t talked to in years… “Amber, lets kick it it’s been awhile”. We exchanged numbers and on the 14th my best friend was over and I invited Tyler to chill and have a couple drinks with us. When we met up we had that instant connection that so many people hope for. We all hung out, had a few drinks, and watched a couple movies. From that day on we were as close to inseparable as two people can be. We figured out early on that this was it, this is my person, I don’t care what it takes; I WILL be with this person no matter what. It’s truly amazing when you find that person who is on the exact same track as you. I do believe opposites can attract but you obviously need to have common interests. Tyler and I are the most similar opposite people you will ever meet; he likes onions (I hate them), I like tomatoes (he hates them), I stay up late and he wakes up early, I draw blood for a living and he gets queasy around it. On the similar side we are both very affectionate towards each other, we both despise country music, and love Mexican food. We both have a love for adventure, nature and enjoy being spontaneous but also love having a quiet, predictable night in. His mom has said having a conversation with me feels like she is talking to Tyler in someone else’s body. We started talking about getting married, having kids, all that good stuff. For our first year anniversary we had a romantic candlelit dinner of Trix and Lucky Charms; it was absolutely perfect. We are a simple couple made up of complicated people.

This year, our second anniversary was a little fancier. In the weeks leading up to our anniversary I began to suspect this one would include a very special event. Tyler attempted to keep it under wraps but apparently he is not a very sly person. He asked me a few times to get my ring size checked which is pretty suspicious but I got it checked, told him and moved on. About 2 weeks later he got a letter in the mail and he was unsure what it was for. I was pumping gas and he asked me to look at it but he had neglected to read the front of the paper which is exactly what he showed me; I started reading it. First line I read was “Thank you for opening an account at Robbins Brothers…” Uh-oh. I quickly turned to put the pump away and replace the gas cap. I acted like I saw nothing and I said nothing to him…but you can definitely be sure I told all of my co-workers about it!

Now for the big day; October 14th 2016 we rented a hotel room and decided to go out for a nice dinner at a laid back restaurant in Old Town that had some killer drink specials. I figured that is where he would propose to me. Nope. We just had a few drinks, some chicken enchiladas and we left. We then decided to go over to Balboa Park and do some walking around. Bingo. Unfortunately nature was calling me and it was pretty urgent. With the bathroom locked and no others in sight we decided to head back to the hotel. We got back and Tyler took my hand and told me to sit down on the bed. As he stood in front of me he told me how much he loved me and that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. He said he hadn’t wanted to do this in a hotel room and then he got down on one knee. I was (surprisingly) in shock and of course when I realized he was proposing I started crying like a baby. He opened the box, the kind with the light inside, and I saw the most beautiful ring I have ever laid eyes on. It was white gold with three small diamonds on either side and a dazzling floating diamond in the middle. I pulled him on the bed and hugged him as hard as I could. We sit up and he says “So is that a yes?” “Of course!” I say and he slips that little piece of love incarnate onto my finger. I have a marvelous time showing it to everyone of course; we have decided not to rush the planning and will probably have a yearlong engagement.

Tyler and I the night he proposed.

Since this is still so new we have very few plans established and we still have so many to make! What kind of dress? Do I go traditional? Be unique? These and so many more questions; I’m feeling a little overwhelmed just thinking about everything we need to do and so unsure about how to do it. There is one thing I am sure of though, as long as I am going through this (or anything) with Tyler it will eventually come together, just like us. The day will take a lot of planning and it may be stressful but we won’t lose sight of the fact that this is a celebration! Marriage is not just about the wedding day, the gown or the gifts. More than that it is about promising the most important person in your life you will never stop making an effort for them and trusting they will never stop making an effort for you. It is understanding that we may not always see eye to eye but we will always find a way to look past our problems and see the big picture. It is about finally finding that person who makes you truly excited to say I do.

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